waiting for the man

dan is on his way to pick me up. then off to nursery school to grab parker and across town to get little nino. i'm thinking a cold glass of chardonnay is in order.

the weather has been remarkable, eerie. i've been wearing my clubmed flip-flops for three days. yesterday we went to ocean beach, played in the sand. miss parker splashed in the frigid waves.

i can't help but to flashback to last november in massachusetts. stark, grey, cold, dark at 4 p.m. i watched my father descend into madness. after one particularly disturbing jack-nicholson-in-the-shining episode, i committed him to the geriatric psych ward at beth israel hospital in boston. he never came home.

i had an infant and an almost three-year-old, a relentless case of thrush and a sinus infection. i managed to pack 40 boxes with dad glaring at me from behind or peeping at me from around corners so my flailing mother could move out of our family home. it was dreadful. all she could do was her crossword puzzles and watch bad tv. she was paralyzed. walking on eggshells. fearing the next outburst of the madman that had ceased to be her husband. my dad.

i managed to get parker to the playground in cochituate every day that it was above 30 degrees and since mom doesn't cook and there was no decent food in the house, we spent hours at the starbucks down the road. god, i looked forward to sitting in the sun at a corner table at starbucks with roman in the stroller and parker drinking hot chocolate.

it was nice to be able to say goodbye to that house though. i certainly got closure. it was nice also to hang out with jules every day and see my aunt jan and uncle george and all my boston peeps. thanksgiving in new england was fun, i helped with the menu and dan, my rock, came up from nyc and extended his stay to support us during those very dark days for the crovo family.

i go back next week for my high school reunion and another thanksgiving at home.