Monday, November 17, 2008

waiting for the man

dan is on his way to pick me up. then off to nursery school to grab parker and across town to get little nino. i'm thinking a cold glass of chardonnay is in order.

the weather has been remarkable, eerie. i've been wearing my clubmed flip-flops for three days. yesterday we went to ocean beach, played in the sand. miss parker splashed in the frigid waves.

i can't help but to flashback to last november in massachusetts. stark, grey, cold, dark at 4 p.m. i watched my father descend into madness. after one particularly disturbing jack-nicholson-in-the-shining episode, i committed him to the geriatric psych ward at beth israel hospital in boston. he never came home.

i had an infant and an almost three-year-old, a relentless case of thrush and a sinus infection. i managed to pack 40 boxes with dad glaring at me from behind or peeping at me from around corners so my flailing mother could move out of our family home. it was dreadful. all she could do was her crossword puzzles and watch bad tv. she was paralyzed. walking on eggshells. fearing the next outburst of the madman that had ceased to be her husband. my dad.

i managed to get parker to the playground in cochituate every day that it was above 30 degrees and since mom doesn't cook and there was no decent food in the house, we spent hours at the starbucks down the road. god, i looked forward to sitting in the sun at a corner table at starbucks with roman in the stroller and parker drinking hot chocolate.

it was nice to be able to say goodbye to that house though. i certainly got closure. it was nice also to hang out with jules every day and see my aunt jan and uncle george and all my boston peeps. thanksgiving in new england was fun, i helped with the menu and dan, my rock, came up from nyc and extended his stay to support us during those very dark days for the crovo family.

i go back next week for my high school reunion and another thanksgiving at home.

Tuesday, November 11, 2008

a birthday post

yeah, so it's my birthday and i'm sitting behind a computer. just bought myself some skinny leg h&m pants and a remainder copy of daphne du maurier's "rebecca." hard times and all.

i started celebrating last thursday with dinner and an overnight stay at hotel vitale at the foot of mission street in sf. much fun, but they didn't have the yoga class i was looking forward to in the morning.

over the weekend, my amazing girlfriends threw me a party and lavished me with gifts. details toward the end of the night are hazy, but i know we closed down cresta's and i had a great time. paid for it most of sunday.

tonight, dan is picking me up and we're having dinner with the kids and my brother and heather at gamine, our friends sue and stephan's french bistro on union street.

i'm looking at places for crovofest 2009, our family reunion, on cape cod. this is a contender.

Thursday, November 6, 2008

a kinder, blacker america

gobama! what an amazing accomplishment -- both for barack obama and this country which i suspected would show what a fearful, bigoted lot i suspected it was. but, i'm pleasantly surprised. elated, even. i love that come january, there will be a black woman raising her two adorable daughters in the WHITE house. and it will be nice to travel abroad again and not have to pretend to be canadian.

today is a stunning, sunny, fall day in SF. i'm downtown at the chronicle where we even got a big shout out/thank you from frank vega, our publisher, for work on the election special issue (which looks great and is sitting on my desk right now).

i have the office to myself and it's quiet. very nice. when i leave here, i'll be checking in to the hotel vitale on the corner of mission and embarcadero for an early birthday celebration. i'm meeting dan, but we're pretending we're having an affair, so maybe i should call him james. his mom will stay over with the munchkins and we will lounge in the rooftop tubs looking over the city and reveling in our good fortune.

for the first time in so many years, i'm actually proud to be an american.